Commentary on ACIM Lesson 160

©2010 Rev. David Seacord

 

I am at home.  Fear is the stranger here.

 

 

The illusion is: the closer to home, the deeper the darkness.....  

 

Whosoever 'denies his brother' is denying Him (the Christ self), and thus is refusing to accept the gift of sight by which our own Self is clearly recognized, our home remembered and our salvation come.

Mom entered from 'stage left' and sat down and began talking.  Dad lay on his bed, exhausted from the recent effort to eating the institutional food.  It has become my evening ritual/sadhana, to take over the mail around 'dinner time' and often something (I think is) healthy for Dad to eat.  But it doesn't matter usually.  Eating almost always exhausts him these days.  Mom shakes her head, (I think) not yet willing to accept the direction Dad is heading or how soon he may head there.  She talks to  Dad and me about old times, the life our family lived through.  Dad barely responds, and mostly only with noises, not words.  As her words continue unabated, I notice I reduce to old attitudes and quietly tune out a bit.  Yet another part of me whispers the truth that 'I do not know when the hour will come'.... and I come back to greater attention, to being present to this.  

 

Suddenly I realize I am no longer here for Dad, really.  I see now I am here for Mom, and for the relationship called 'me and mom', and it's healing.  Interesting, that the 'black sheep eccentric son' would be the one to come back at this time.  I didn't realize this would be part of the full curriculum certainly, or ego/me would have found excuses (probably... maybe not...).  But I didn't realize what calling a few friends and saying 'Hey, let's all redo A Course in Miracles this year' was going to lead to either.  

 

I think everyone of us has swallowed the hook and God has us on His/Her line.  I think that line is never going to break either.  God is real good at letting us run 'free' and 'fight the line' and pretend that we can be and do darn well anything we desire too, but just give it enough time, and we eventually discover that that line and that hook are not there to kill us, but to save us.  And to give us the power connection to walk to talk.  

 

Of course what I am seeing tonight clearly is that walk will always take us/me right back to the beginning, to our/my primary earth parents and siblings, to heal, re-learn, and transform deep and dark and blind 'ego-oldness' that has kept us/me from being fully fully fully present and lit up under all circumstances.... EVEN WHEN WITH OUR FAMILIES OF ORIGIN. 

 

Its been said that to heal our families is to heal the world.  I think I am one who thought maybe I could skip that one.  Now, I guess I was wrong about that.  Will keep you posted.  

 

Namaste, 

 

David

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My personal version, in first person.

 

Lesson 160

I am at home. Fear is the stranger here.

Fear is an alien stranger to the ways of love. Therefore, if I identify with fear, I will be a stranger to myself. And thus, I am unknown to myself. What is my true Self then, remains an alien to the part of me which thinks that it is real (but different from my true self). How could I be sane in such a circumstance? Who (but a madman) could 'believe he is what he is not', and then judgeagainst himself?

There is a 'stranger' inside my ego-mind, who comes from an idea so foreign to the truth he speaks a different language, looks upon a world truth does not know, and somehow 'understands' what truth regards as senseless. Stranger yet, this stranger does not recognize 'to whom he comes', and yet, he maintains 'this homebelongs to him', while he who is rightfully at home is now made 'alien'. And yet, how easy it would be for me to say, "No. This is my home. Here I belong, and I will not leave because a strange madman says I must."

What 'reason' is there for my not saying this? What could the reason be except that I had asked this stranger in (to take my place, and let me become a stranger to myself)? I would not let myself be dispossessed so needlessly, unless I had mistakenly 'thought I thought' there was somehow 'another home' more suited to my tastes.

Who is this stranger whose name is Fear? And is it Fear or is it My Self who is unsuited to the home which God provided for His Son? Is fear His Own, and created in My Fathers likeness? Is it fear that Love completes, and is completed by? No. There is no home can shelter love and fear. They cannot coexist. If I AM real, then fear must be illusion. And if fear is real, then I do not exist at all.

How simply, then, the question is resolved. Whosoever fears has denied himself and said, "I am the stranger here. And so I leave my home to one more like me than myself, and give him all I thought belonged to me." Now am I exiled of necessity, not knowing who I am, uncertain of all things but this; that I am not myself, and that my home has been denied to me.

What do I search for now? What can I find? Anyone a stranger to himself can find no home wherever he may look, for he has made his own return impossible. His way is lost, excepting that 'a miracle' will search him out and show him that he is 'no stranger now'. That miracle will come to everyone. For in his true home his Self still remains. It has asked no stranger in, and it has taken no alien thought to be Itself. And It will call Its Own unto Itself in recognition of what is Its Own.

Who is the stranger? Is it not the one my true Self calls not? If I am unable now to recognize this stranger in my midst, it is because I have given him my rightful place. Yet is my true Self as certain of Its Own as God is of His Son. God cannot be 'confused' about creation. He is sure of what belongs to Him. No stranger can be interposed between His knowledge and His Son's reality. He does not know of strangers. And He is certain of His Son.

God's certainty suffices me and is my salvation. Who He knows to be His Son belongs where He has set His Son forever. He has answered I who ask, "Who is the stranger?" I hear His Voice assure me, quietly and sure, that I am not a stranger to my Father, nor is my Creator  a stranger made to me. And whom God has joined remain forever one, at home in Him, and no stranger to Himself.

Today I offer thanks that Christ has come to 'search the world' for me, for I am one what belongs to Him. His vision sees no strangers,  He simply beholds His Own and joyously unites with them. We/I (perhaps) see Him 'as a stranger', for we/I do not recognize ourselves yet. Yet as we give Him welcome, we will remember. And He will  lead us gently home again, where we belong.

Not one does Christ forget. Not one He fails to give me to remember, that my home may be complete and perfect as it was established. He has not forgotten me or anyone else. But I will not remember Him until I look on all as He does. Whosoever 'denies his brother' is denying Him, and thus is refusing to accept the gift of sight by which our own Self is clearly recognized, our home remembered and our salvation come.