Commentary on ACIM Lesson 236

© 2010 Rev. David Seacord

I rule my mind, which I alone must rule.

As I entered the bedroom this morning where my father lays with eyes mostly closed these days, Mom was speaking to him quietly. "Now, here is someone who is really here... do you know who it is?" My father slowly opens his eyes, tries to focus on me, and then says to Mom... "Yes, this is my son David". He smiles like a contented child, seeing that I am there.

"How are you, Dad?" I ask him. He doesn't answer for a moment. Then he says.... "It's wonderful." He continues softly..."it's wonderful, wonderful, it's wonderful...".

He is, I realize, not speaking about anything I can see. But where he is, and what he is seeing is now becoming very real.....

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As they approach their 65th wedding anniversary a few days hence (Aug. 31) , Mom has set up an alter of sorts on the table outside the apartment door to share with the assisted living community. It has the story of their life upon it.... wedding photo, picture albums, a scrapbook about the different churches Dad was pastor at.... Mom's demeanor, in the past often upset 'because he won't eat enough to keep himself alive' has become much gentler, as she nurses him by placing a wet sponge into his mouth to give him moisture because swallowing has become difficult.

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The stages of this transition passage often change suddenly, sometimes seemingly reversing back and forth in the course of a few hours. During my visit this evening I was surprised to be able to feed him a little, and shave him, as he sat in his wheelchair. He struggles to be able to form clearly spoken words these days, but his eyes tell me he's still at home. Tonight, as Mom was outside walking their beloved companion dog, Dad slowly, word by word, gasps out between labored breaths "Son, I don't know if I can keep it going much longer....". I know he can't say this to Mom. She still resists his departure.... I touch him gently on his arm... "Yes, I'm seeing that too Dad. It's getting close, but when is all in God's hands. You know this world will keep on going....you don't need to worry about us Dad, we'll all be OK. And Dad, you know there is nothing to be afraid of...." Dad's look tells me as much as the gentle squeeze he gives my hand in his....

I thank you all for your thoughts and prayers. Love knows what it is doing.....

Namaste,

David

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Lesson 236

I rule my mind, which I alone must rule.

I have a kingdom I must rule. At times, it does not seem I am its king at all. It seems to triumph over me, and tell me what to think, and what to do and feel. And yet it has been given me to serve whatever purpose I perceive in it. My mind can only serve. Today I give its service to the Holy Spirit to employ as He sees fit. I thus direct my mind, which I alone can rule. And thus I set it free to do the Will of God.

Father, my mind is open to Your Thoughts, and closed today to every thought but Yours. I rule my mind, and offer it to You. Accept my gift, for it is Yours to me.